Inputs:
Priestdaddy by Patricia Lockwood: I started this memoir primarily to find out the mechanics of the central premise: that Lockwood’s father is a Catholic priest. Had I come across a single review that explained how this arrangement came to be, I might have passed on reading it. That would have been a great pity because spending time with her family was a surreal and hilarious journey. Despite the fact that I, like Lockwood, went to an all-girls Catholic school and, unlike Lockwood, am still a practicing member of the Church, I felt like I was reading about a foreign world. It is so rare as a lay person to get a peek behind the dusty velvet curtain hiding religious life, and when she jerks the curtain back all the way the harsh and dazzling light makes the view almost unrecognizable. But you needn’t have been raised Catholic to appreciate the story of Lockwood’s colorful and complicated family; and her attempts to reconcile the way the Church influenced her, at times brought her comfort, and ultimately failed her.
Outputs:
Priestdaddy was such a delight to read but also excruciating because every few pages I thought “I will never be able to write this well.” It was so good I couldn’t even tell myself that anyone could have pulled it off just as brilliantly if only they had the great fortune, from the perspective of gathering literary material, of growing up in an ecclesiastical loophole. But seeing how she had constructed the narrative from the events of her life led me to wonder how Lockwood's parents felt about her depiction of them, which is loving but unsparing. At this point in my life, it seems more and more that it's my children who are the true protagonists of whatever story I'm part of. I'm still getting used to the idea, but it's likely that thinking of myself as a supporting role in the universe rather than its center is healthier in the long run. That said, if my kids ever write about me in such vivid detail I hope they will be as good at it as Lockwood.
Condiment Corner:
David Chang has made many statements about how his chili crisp differs from Lao Gan Ma chili crisp. I am not discerning enough to recognize what those differences are, but like LGM it improves pretty much anything it’s put on. The Momofuku site suggests many uses. I think I’ll try it on grilled cheese next.